Friday, February 21, 2020

A bitch overhears a lot at lunch.

So my love, who works on the other side of the world, took me to virtual lunch.  I ordered my favorite thing- chicken Marsala.  This comes with red mashed potatoes, the perfect amount of gravy, and these green beans to DIE FOR. 

While I was enjoying my meal it came to my attention that someone in the dining room has one of THOSE voices.  My god she’s a megaphone.  Her laugh cuts through all other noise and their group conversation is loud enough for me to hear every part.  Really it’s not the group, it’s just her. 

That’s annoying enough. But she was loud talking about gastric surgery and weight loss.  The side effects of such surgeries and the detrimental effects on nutrient absorption.  I was happy she was speaking correct facts but holy shit she was loud! Going on at length about gastric bypass and losing weight and mind games you play to modify eating behavior. Nothing was gross, but it did seem inappropriate lunch conversation.  

An older couple, probably in their 80s, is near me.  They’re speaking quietly and drinking white wine.  I noticed the woman looking rather judgily in the direction of the loud diet talker.  I couldn’t have agreed more.  She was bothered. The gentleman eating alone next to them also seemed to notice.  The waitress seemed to notice. 

Finally someone at her table says jokingly “maybe this isn’t a great lunch conversation ahahaha”   Raucous laughter.  Then conversation continued about carbs and weight watchers and somehow it mercifully shifted to dogs. 
Then she booms “and I knew she needed to go potty” (I wish font could convey volume...) 

Good grief woman.  Just shut the fuck up.  

First of all be whoever you are.  Talk about what you want.  But do it with some class, timing, decorum.  

The thing that bothered me most though was that here we are in this amazing restaurant and this is their conversation choice? To impose upon us all?  Argh!  

I respect entirely that people struggle with food and body image and diet culture.  But my god.  Maybe if we could just let ourselves exist outside the ever changing societal expectations of what our bodies should look like we would struggle less!!!  

As I write she’s talking about molly, who is a lesbian (loud font).   I think I’d better exit before my facial expressions betray me 

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